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Long distance - never thought I'd be doing it Sort by:
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Mar 18, 2008 08:34

Never in a million years would I have thought I'd be interested in a man that lived far far away. BUT, I could be wrong ! Actually I AM WRONG. A guy, from this website, lives in Washington State, I'm in Florida. He is moving to PA on April 1st, so the time zone and the miles will be more manageable. Same time zone, approximately 16 hours away. Now my other questions as there are a few on here that are doing it with success. Do you use your webcams and phone? or just the webcam and IM? How are you doing it? How are you learning about each other? How are you making the miles evaporate? Thanks, Natalie


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smoosh
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Veröffentlicht am Sun, Mar 23, 2008 19:28

Hi Natalie, With regards to long distance relationships I think it is important to know that one of you would have to willing to move in order to even "fall in like" - there is no point if one of you can't change locations. Chat, Email, phone , test, phone , snail mail are all great ways to keep in touch and I agree with Stacey and Blue - probably much more time discussing everything under the sun than the norm. Good Luck - nothing ventured nothing gained - Di


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Veröffentlicht am Fri, Mar 21, 2008 05:56

WOW, thanks for all of the good ideas !! This is still new, him and the distance. He's moving to PA the first week of April, the time zone difference will end. The distance will be about 16 hours instead of 2500 Miles ( no clue how long that is in hours to drive) I'll keep you all posted. After our first face to face meeting, which is still a few months away. I'm truly having fun though !! I can always count on my LF-FRIENDS !!! Natalie


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stannosstacey
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Mar 18, 2008 17:35

Congrats on finding someone! Long distance relationships....let me tell you it is hard BUT for the right person it is worth it. Stanno and I have been talking since August and engaged since November and working on his visa to move here so we can marry. At times it is so hard and almost unbearable but I envision the end result and keeping going. We text message through out the day and in the evenings we get on the computers and talk using the webcams. After we first met in November we made a deal that we would not go a month without seeing each other in person and we have pretty much held up to that. We mail cards and letters at times and packages sometimes. The most important part of it is communication. We make that priority. We talk about everything - insecurities, joys, sadness, everything. We also try to do things together while on the computer. We play games on yahoo messenger, we check out websites of places we want to go together, places we have been, send photos back and forth, etc. One great thing about having a long distance relationship is the talking. We talk more than other couples we know because we can't do anything else. Other couples go out to dinner, movies, concerts and events which does not always make conversation essential. We talk for literally hours. I think we have gotten to know each other better doing it this way. And I think when the visa process is all over with and we are finally together (can't wait!!!!) we will not take each other for granted. Our time spent together in person is so precious and rare that when we are finally married we will remember how long and hard we fought for it. For me, the distance is difficult and very hard at times but so worth it when I see his face and feel his arms around me. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you.


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bluegirl2006
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Mar 18, 2008 17:09

Good questions. The biggest thing you need to consider with a LDR is - if all goes according to plan, is one or both of you willing to move for the sake of the relationship? If not, there is no point in having the LDR. Some of us have made it work quite well, although my Peter and I don't move nearly as fast as some of the other couples who have found each other here - comparitively we are moving at a snail's pace, lol. But that has given us much time to get to know each other very very well. My Peter and I met here and have been in a LDR for two years come May. Initially we started out with daily email and weekend IM sessions. (We have a BIG time difference.) Later we graduated to webcam (without sound - we both had cheapies that didn't have a mic) and continued our weekly IM sessions in addition to the email. At least then we could see each other while we communicated. It was awesome to be able to see him laugh when I amused him, or frown when he was concentrating on something I said. Later we added the phone. We still do the phone about once a month, but that adds up pretty quickly in (international calling) costs. (Although I have very fond memories of many long phone "dates" including one that was 13 hours.) (sigh) Since you folks are both in the US, if you have cell phones there should be no long distance charges so phone might work really well for you if you have free nights/weekends, etc. You just can't see each other on the phone. My Peter upgraded his webcam, then he upgraded mine. Now we both have digital webcams with mics. So most of the time now, we use the webcams and we spend 3 or 4 hours together EVERY day this way. Typically, a couple of hours in the morning before work and a couple of hours at night before bed. We even sleep together - and I mean SLEEP, lol. When you spend that much time with someone you DO get to know them well. Even long distance. Although we do sometimes have technical difficulties with the conferencing website that we use this works really well for us. We also, occasionally still randomly call each other on the phone or send text messages. We've been doing this for a long, long time. The distance is frustrating for both of us at times, but our relationship is amazing and we both believe it will be life-long. I'm visiting my Peter in July for nearly two weeks. If all goes according to plan, in the next year or so I will move there to be with him. Anyone who says you can't get to know someone long distance is wrong. You CAN. It takes effort on both parts, but you CAN.


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nodramaaroundme
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Mar 18, 2008 13:24

When I'm in a long distance relationship, I am thankful for unlimited long distance calling...LOL. Also it was a great benifit working for a hotel company and getting discounted rates. All that being said, I'm so happy for you having a love (like) interest. I know all those beautiful pictures in your profile didn't hurt. Good Luck!


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