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wanda_world
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Oct 17, 2006 12:22

I have an intensely inquisitive mind and am always trying to see things from different perspectives. I just read the following comment written by a man in another blog (about not reading profiles) and wondered-is this how most guys think? Do men just look at pictures first, wink, and then if they get a response go back and read a profile? Is that how men think? Is that possibly why so many men seem to say very little in their profiles-because they themselves don't read what they say? I honestly don't understand why some guys don't write anything about themselves or just one sentence on their profile. Is this true? Is this how men look at profiles or is this man in the minority here? Latindancer21 wrote: "Men are usaully more visual creatures --- for the most part if they are attracted to your physical appearance they can overlook the small details. But usaully you can count on a wink first --- you wink back --- if you wink back he should check your profile to get the whole picture before the emails start etc... If you cant get past his physical appearance then his wink wast that hard --- if he had invested the time to go over your profile with a fine toother comb and then been rejected it would probably be more discouraging"


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Veröffentlicht am Sun, Jun 10, 2007 15:01

I found this topic very interesting. I will agree to the fact that we(men)can be very visual. I do beileve that some physical attraction is important for any relationaship to work. we all have different ideas of what is attractive. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder they say. For me, If there is no picture on a profile I usually don't pay it much attention. If I can put mine out there so can everybody else. If a picture catches my eye, I read the profile completely before even thinking about sending a wink or email. I look for common interests, if I meet the "criteria" she is looking for. If I like the profile then I will initiate contact.


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honeybiscuit
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Jun 09, 2007 06:52

tis true wanda - nice blog and wonderful comments. there are some real sweethearts in and amoungst the not so sweet ones here. thanks for giving us insight and encouragement.


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coachy
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Jun 09, 2007 01:21

Pretty much all guys want is a woman how looks good and is easy. Renoruonaz

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wanda_world
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Veröffentlicht am Tue, Jan 02, 2007 00:18

Thanks to all of you refined gentlemen who have graced my blog with your presence! It is wonderful to know that some men actually do read, contemplate what a profile says, and delve beyond the appearance of a person to discover what may perhaps be inside. To me, a wise man realizes that a woman is a multifaceted individual whom they should regard as much more than just a body or a picture. Thanks for sharing your wonderfully analytical minds with us ladies!


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Veröffentlicht am Sun, Dec 31, 2006 00:26

I have a specific routine when reading an ad: (1) Did she pick an interesting name? "Jane2006" less desirable than "JoanOfArcadia"; (2) What's her profile's title? "Lookin4Luv" less desirable than "TrinityWantsNeo"; (3) What does her profile actually say, objectively? "Sweet, nice, friendly" less desirable than "Feed ducks at the park, volunteer at homeless shelter, member of Greenpeace"; and, finally, (4) When was her photo taken? 1906 less desirable than 2006.


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oilman55
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Dec 30, 2006 23:50

Wanda, for myself I try to find out what the lady of interest is interested in...d


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huskyredbear
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Veröffentlicht am Fri, Dec 29, 2006 07:15

What up Wanda!! Yeah we men are very visual, but it's what they do afterwards that makes the difference. Me personally, I love a big thick woman with a big smile that won't quit. But then after I get through looking at ya,if you open up your mouth and start talking like a chicken head.....o...m...g! I have to be stimulated by your mind also,because I couldn't stand to be in the company of a "clucka"! (chickenhead)no matter how good you look!


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AbzWayne
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Veröffentlicht am Fri, Dec 29, 2006 06:22

Okies.... Pic to grab the attention - works for me, but I am always looking for that other slightly daft git to help make me whole... Cuddle factor - Have a look at the profile and see what they are all about, also other pics, can they have fun... Profile with NO PICS - Trickier, i do base most of my life on gut feelings and first glances, but there are a few great profiles out there without pics, its a bitty like Blind Date.... Now for the kicker...... Damaged Goods - Please don't hate me for this, but for being a guy that has been fairly unlucky in past relationships in regards to violence and unfaithfulness, I do tend to take a bit of time to get to know folks for what they are, usually costing me as i take way to long to finally commit.... Thats why I like this idea, find a profile ye like, or even just a forum blog, guage folks on their answers, but mainly, be there for folks..... Just a shame at comments and stuff take a while to get posted ....but I can see why that is required. Okies, time for me to wrap up this.... out of curiosity?? what was the original Blog ??? Ahhhh ... Summary - I tend to look to the inside of folks afore I commit to anything serious, if they are being to guarded about something, then that is usually the blocker for me. ats my Hmmmmm say 57pence worth... Hugz fae a Daft Cuddly Scotsman


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mackem39
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Veröffentlicht am Mon, Nov 06, 2006 18:00

i would have to say that yes the photo is the first thing that grabs your attention but i always check out the profile cos if im not wot there after then wots the point in winking . hav now found that profiles with no photo get me a better response since its easier to believe when i say i only wanna chat cos there not being judged on a photo


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wanda_world
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Veröffentlicht am Mon, Nov 06, 2006 10:24

Thanks to all of you for your comments. Lady-I think you are correct-women do tend to want security and seem to be more willing to get to know a man before making a decision rather than going just by a picture right away. A man can miss out on having a relationship with a beautiful person because they just looked at the exterior and not the interior. One can also end up with a very nice looking person who is not quite so wonderful inside. A pretty shiny red apple can be full of worms. Surfingurl, I think you have pointed out something that is important-in my opinion anyway. Many men don't take the time to read or write, or sometimes, I have found, when they do write, don't answer questions that I ask. I think Lazy Afternoons is a prime example of how someone can get attention; he not only takes the time to write something,he harmlessly flirts and compliments the ladies. Most women like to know that someone is paying attention to them, and although compliments may get a man no-where, they usually are welcomed and make a person feel good. LA's managed to get attention-albeit some of it is not positive- because even though he has come across as rather preposterous "seeking just se*x" he has also managed to come across as playful,romantic,humorous and creative,qualities that many women like. He gets the reader to see this, not because he has told anyone that, but because he has taken the time to write and let others see his personality. Does he really seek "just se*x?", or does he really just seek "attention"? Laughing..I don't know, but he has gotten much attention. Quietman, thank-you for the compliment,speaking up and joining the discussion. I appreciate it. Yes, my comments are a genuine expression of how I feel about things. And we do all reserve the right to our prefernces. I agree "love" in the poetic sense is "romantic"; it is not only a feeling but it is an action. One can feel love, but it should also be expressed verbally and in motion-a tender touch, a smile from across the room,a phone call just to say you care. There are just so many other ways a person can communicate love to another-sending flowers,helping with the kids,ironing a shirt,cooking a special dinner, doing the dishes, taking one somewhere special, staying in a relationship that is not as fullfilling and satisfying as one hoped it would be,spending the day with the in-laws who make you feel like an outlaw. Laughing..yeah..things do get in my path-too often sometimes! I just laugh about it!


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bizzle49
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Veröffentlicht am Mon, Nov 06, 2006 10:16

ahh sweet wanda..i said that so you wouldn't have to LOL


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surfingurl
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Veröffentlicht am Mon, Nov 06, 2006 04:13

I think too many get caught up in the photo and don't take the time to actually read. On the flip side of that, I don't think many take the time to write, except for Lazy Afternoons. He takes the time to write and look at how much attention he gets.


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wanda_world
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Veröffentlicht am Sun, Nov 05, 2006 20:02

Ah but Bizzle...a goofy email would have gotten my attention right away! It's not necessarily what someone says that makes me notice them-it may be how they say it or how they get my attention that attracts me.


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bizzle49
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Nov 04, 2006 21:45

not being a paying member here it's a little hard...when i was paying for other sites..I'd read a profile (yes sometimes a picture did turn my head a little more than usual)...if interested, would send a wink figuring would give the lady a chance to read my profile and to wink back if interested,,,then I would send mail if I got a wink back kinda like fishing and yeah I might have been luckier if I just sent a goofy mail instead of a wink at the git go there I stopped ya from saying that lol


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quietman22
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Veröffentlicht am Fri, Nov 03, 2006 17:57

Honest expression seems to have become a lost art but, not so in your comments. I think your comments are an honest expression of how you feel about things. That is good !! Men are visual and so are women. It is never clear who are the more visual. However one thing is certainly clear about both men and women alike, We often miss an opportunity in really getting to know someone because of our mental fantasy of what is beautiful and or attractive is. But we do reserve the right to our preferences. Beauty is the ability to be open and honest and an expression of our feelings are to start of good communication. It takes away the guessing. An expression of "LOVE" in the poetic sense is "Romantic". Just my thoughts. The visual debate will always go on. Its why they call us human. You're not klutzy things just get in your path.


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LADY2006
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Oct 21, 2006 20:55

NOT A GUY, BUT RESPONDING...YES MEN ARE VISUAL FIRST...BUT IN ALL TRUTH, SO ARE WOMEN TO A POINT. MEN WANT THE LOOKS FOREMOST, THEN GET TO KNOW YOU, WICH REALLY LIMITS THEIR ABILITY TO BE WITH THE RIGHT GAL, AS IF THEY WOULD LIKE THE INNER PERSON, THE LOOKS WOULDNT MATTER AS MUCH. REAL LOVE COMES FROM COMPATABILITY, THE REST IS ACTUALLY, DARE I SAY, LUST. WOMEN DO LOOK AT THE VISUAL ALSO, BUT ARE MORE WILLING TO GIVE A MAN A CHANCE BEFORE A DECISION IS MADE..WE THINK IN TERMS OF SECURITY. BUT THERE ARE WOMEN WHO ARE JUST AS VISUAL DRIVEN AS MEN


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wanda_world
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Veröffentlicht am Sat, Oct 21, 2006 09:01

Bigheart,Tigger,Bizzle and Phantom, thank-you for taking the time and expressing your feelings. I don't think we can ever learn too much about the way the opposite sex thinks and the more willing and open we are to communicate, the greater our ability to understand each other. This does somewhat explain to me why some men on their profiles post these pictures of them either nude or with no shirt on. Perhaps some women are more visual than I am;to me the profile is saying "come and get me baby...I'm all about the sex." The truth is, most of us are indeed sexual creatures, but if that is the best a man has to offer (or all he has to offer) is sex, I am not interested. After awhile people do get tired, and then what? While I try hard not to be shallow and judge a book by its cover, I usually don't stay long on a profile page where the picture posted is of a man wearing no shirt-unless he's actually at the beach or pool. It also explains too why so many guys write so little on their profiles-if they don't read profiles, they think women don't read them either so they see no reason to say anything on them. I have read so many profiles that basically say "I'm a man, such and such age, with brown/blonde and avg/large/athletic build." Okay, I am supposed to be interested in him for what reason? Just because he's a man? Speaking for myself only, I like to know what's inside a man,what makes him tick, how he treats others, what's important to him in life, is he capable of thinking beyond copulating? Can he communicate effectively? Thanks guys..I'm off to change my photo to one of two melons!


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Veröffentlicht am Thu, Oct 19, 2006 04:59

Unfortunately for most women guys are indeed very visual people. We do intend to go by the visual stimulation first. That is why we watch and stare so much...lol. It then forces women to adjust and yes sometimes some men will not actually read a profile at all before responding based soley on personal preferences and the visual stimulation.


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bizzle49
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Veröffentlicht am Wed, Oct 18, 2006 23:52

oh the profile has to be read!!! but then again I used to read Playboy for the articles LOL


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