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total posts: 257
Blog title: My blog
Blog description: My blog
My blog address: http://LargeFriends.com/blog/jjiggl
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When does a "No-No" become a "Yes-Yes"? Posted on Sat, Apr 21, 2007 00:00
Many of us have listed items on our profiles that let the reader know what we DO NOT WANT and what we DESIRE in a mate. And from many of the posts and blogs that I have read on this site, it seems that many of us are sticking to our guns and, (for use of a better phrase)--"not settling". I met someone here who has a characteristic that I did not list as a "no-no" on my profile, but in the past, I had ALWAYS considered it to be a definite "flaw". I was so turned off by this characteristic, that in the past I would look for this "no-no" whenever I met a man. If he had this "no-no", he NEVER got more than friendly conversation out of me. (And he only got that much from me because I did not want to offend him). I have actually rejected men who were otherwise very attractive to me, but immediately became undesirable and quite repulsive to me when I saw that they had this "flaw". The man that I met here, who I am madly and passionately in love with, has this characteristic and it doesn't even bother me. In fact, when I first met him, I did not even look for it. When I finally noticed that he had it, I disregarded it and did not pay much attention to it. I am truly grateful that I did not meet him in the "traditional" way and got to know him via IM and the phone first. Had I seen him before I met him, I would have let my "prejudice" get in the way and would have dismissed the love of my life. Having said all of this, my question is: Have any of you met someone who was a "no-no" and became a "yes-yes"? Does anyone know why we have these so-called standards, many of which have nothing to do with love? If so, please share your story.
OK. I'm finally going to do it Posted on Fri, Jul 14, 2006 00:00
I am finally going to call my sister and get my half-brother's phone number so that I can get my father's phone number. My half-brother is the only one who really keeps in touch with my father. I guess he does not have any ill will towards him. God, I wish I could be that way towards my father. I am so afraid that when I contact my dad, he won't be glad to hear from me. I am afraid that he will be in the middle of doing something else and tell me that he'll have to call me back. And that will just kill me. I want to have a relationship with him but I am so afraid of making the first move. I don't want to be rejected or worse--put off until he has time to deal with me. That would make me feel like he is dangling me on a string: a feeling that I really hate. I can hardly type thinking about the "what if's" of the situation. And like I always do, I am "awfulizing" our phone call. I am trying to think about the worse that could happen so that I will be prepared when it does happen. (That statement there just set me back about two months worth of self analysis.) Regardless of how scared that I am about contacting him, I have to do it now because I said it aloud and because I am "putting it down on paper" so to speak by posting it on the blog. God help me!!
Father's Day Posted on Thu, Jun 15, 2006 00:00
Father's Day will be here in a few days. While my father lives about 20 minutes away from me, I don't feel compelled to send him a card, call him or be with him on Father's Day. The only thing that I feel is sadness. Even though I am a grown woman, with a grown child of my own, I still feel sad when I think about my father. By the time I was 7 years old, my mom and dad divorced and my dad has not really looked back since. When I was about 20 years old, I remember looking at an old photo album in which there were several pictures of me as a very young child. In many of the pictures, I was dressed up and I remember a particular group of them in which I was in a local park. Because there were so many pictures, I got the feeling that the person who took them must have really loved me alot and thought that I was special. I got kind of teary eyed and sentimental about it because I never realized that I was loved like that in my life. I never thought that anyone thought that I was a precious little child that they loved most parents love their little baby. When I asked my mother who took those pictures of me, I was shocked when she told me that my father took them. I didn't say anything to her at the time, but I was very upset when she told me. I was upset because I wondered when he stopped loving me like that. When did he decide that I was not worthy of the love that father's have for their little girls? I still wonder that to this day.