Members Only
Most Recent Visitors
Members Only

30 • Man
Members Only

56 • Man
Members Only

39 • Man
Members Only

31 • Man
Members Only

49 • Man
Members Only

36 • Man
My biggest conundrum Posted on May 07, 2006 at 03:17 AM
So, I've been pretty 'skinny' in my day. At five nine and a size eleven, I looked pretty ok, and I got a lot of attention from guys. Which, by all means, was nice, most of the time. As I slowly gained weight however, the attention waned. Now, I'm not terribly uncomfortable in my own skin, but I feel that I should lose some weight -- I'm over thirty, and I'd like to keep my knees and hips ans heart for another decade or five. Even more importantly, I want to be able to fly long distances without having my ass looking cubic by the time I get off the plane. I want to be able to go into any store and fit at least something in there besides a scarf. So -- the million dollar question is -- why don't I? Why do I whine about it? For years on end, without losing more than -- ten pounds here and there? That's what I'm trying to figure out. I remember a guy friend of my, in high school -- and bless his heart, I KNOW he meant nothing by it, he was and is a wonderful person -- but he stated in all sincerity, that if I was to lose a few pounds, all the guys in school would drool over me. Yeah. Thanks. I think. I have this notion in my head now that I don't ever want a man who wouldn't want to be with me now, but who would love me if I dropped five or ten sizes. Two major issues with that though. The first one being that a) How the hell will I know and b) Who am I to judge that way, when I myself, for instance, would never consider dating someone significantly shorter than me? After all, that's pretty darned superficial, too? Not to mention the dubious prospect of staying a size I'm not entirely comfortable with simply because I'm pissy with the world for possibly not accepting me the way I am... And yes, I might as well admit to the fact that the guy I have feelings for pointed out to me yesterdays that we are just having a good time and that we both know it's not going anywhere. Yeah. NOW we both know. Sigh. I am sorry for ranting and raving. Certainly not my original intention when signing up here, but I suppose, if I can't really figure out how to actually talk to anybody here, I might as well talk to myself. Have a splendid morning, world...
Random thoughts, fears and concerns... Posted on Apr 18, 2006 at 03:04 AM
So, I'm quite new here (and I have no picture up, because, frankly, I don't feel comfortable enough in here yet. If no one sees my profile or care enough to check me out at this point, so be it. I do think there is a slight difference between men and women pertaining to safety, and, let's face it -- we could all be freaks and psychos for all we know... The thing I can't seem to get out of my mind is this-- What is the motivation behind being attracted to big women? Sure, more to love, womanly, and all that, BUT -- What if I lose all the weight? Would you still be as attracted to me, or would you try to feed me like a prize pig? What if I am just as conceited or stuck up or full of myself as the skinny girl next door? Would you still be attracted to me, or are you in actuality attracted to my lower self-esteem and self-worth? I have a nagging feeling that many men are in here because they are under the impression that big women are easier to get, easier to satisfy and more likely to 'settle'... Am I too cynical?